Friday, December 09, 2005

Why China hates Forbattle

"Forbattle production."
"Matt?"
"No, this is Harry."
"Oh, ok. Harry? This is Matt."
"Oh hey, Matt! How's it going?"
"Great. L-look, Everyone in China hates you now, except me, ok?"
"..ok."
"I'm...I'm your guy here. A positive word about China has to go on the website."
"Ohh, we already talked about this, dude."
"Yeah, I know. But that is what they want to hear."
"We already talked about this!!"
"I know that, and you know that, but this is where the money's at. This is wh..."
"I don't care about that!"
"Hello?"
"..."
"H-harry?"
"Hello?"
"Look. Harry. The Chinese government is the best government ever made."
"...How can you say that?!?!?"
"W-w-what did I say?"
"The Chinese government is the best government ever made."
"I agree with you, Harry. I agree with you right there. It is a great government - and I know that."
"NO! Fuck that! The Chinese government sucks! We hate that government!"
"Look?..."
"...Hello?"
"Hello. Look? Will you just listen to this latest press release from the Chinese Government?"
"No!"
"Just hear it..."
"No! Fuck that! We said 'No!' to this government like a decade ago!"
"Wou.."
"They exploit their people, and destroy the environment and do this whole 'redefinition of socialism' thing. And _our_ government is pissing in their pockets and don't do anything about human rights abuses because China buys all of our raw materials!"
"Ok. I'm your guy here!"
"No!"
"Ok! Ok. This is just you and me talking, but fuck Matt!"
"You are Matt!"
"Ok, fuck Harry. He doesn't care about..."
"This IS Harry!"
"...Matt?"
"...Harry?"

No comments: